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I...am pathetic.
Jul. 21st, 2009 03:56 pmSeriously.
I've made a conscious decision not to get involved in the current wank going on. Mainly because I'm not particularly outraged and my first reaction to the cover when Realms of Fantasy hit my mailbox was "Ooo, she's pretty." Does this make me a bad feminist? Probably. Do I care? Considering all my other political stances that supposedly make me a bad feminist, I'm going to go with "no."
Of course, posting about it probably means that I just involved myself. Erm.
In other news, I spent ten minutes today turning RDJ's hair in the color part of this wallpaper blond. Like I said. Pathetic. Robert doesn't even play Ben in my head anymore, nor does Ben smoke. Gaaaaaaaaah. (If anyone wants to see it, I'll upload it. But, like I said, pathetic![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
agilebrit is pathetic.)
In other other news, I'm discovering that I suck at the Comfort part of Hurt/Comfort. Tearing a character apart? Easy peasy. Putting them back together afterwards? Not so much. This may be because of the whole psychological thing of it being simpler to break a person than it is to un-break them. Ben's crack about "years of therapy" isn't far off the mark.
Another part of my problem with this is that I'm at the "I want to throw it off a bridge and possibly follow it down" stage of writing it. All it is, is one relentless hurt-fest. I'm terribly afraid that it sucks big green mossy rocks and that there's no way Ben comes out of it anything like whole. I'm 86K words into it, the endgame isn't making itself felt, and now I'm wondering if it ever will because it's horrible anyway and my subconscious knows that.
At the same time I can't stop writing it.
*bangs head on keyboard. repeatedly*
I've made a conscious decision not to get involved in the current wank going on. Mainly because I'm not particularly outraged and my first reaction to the cover when Realms of Fantasy hit my mailbox was "Ooo, she's pretty." Does this make me a bad feminist? Probably. Do I care? Considering all my other political stances that supposedly make me a bad feminist, I'm going to go with "no."
Of course, posting about it probably means that I just involved myself. Erm.
In other news, I spent ten minutes today turning RDJ's hair in the color part of this wallpaper blond. Like I said. Pathetic. Robert doesn't even play Ben in my head anymore, nor does Ben smoke. Gaaaaaaaaah. (If anyone wants to see it, I'll upload it. But, like I said, pathetic
agilebrit is pathetic.)In other other news, I'm discovering that I suck at the Comfort part of Hurt/Comfort. Tearing a character apart? Easy peasy. Putting them back together afterwards? Not so much. This may be because of the whole psychological thing of it being simpler to break a person than it is to un-break them. Ben's crack about "years of therapy" isn't far off the mark.
Another part of my problem with this is that I'm at the "I want to throw it off a bridge and possibly follow it down" stage of writing it. All it is, is one relentless hurt-fest. I'm terribly afraid that it sucks big green mossy rocks and that there's no way Ben comes out of it anything like whole. I'm 86K words into it, the endgame isn't making itself felt, and now I'm wondering if it ever will because it's horrible anyway and my subconscious knows that.
At the same time I can't stop writing it.
*bangs head on keyboard. repeatedly*
